Chapter 45

It all seems so fast.  How time seemed to just move at lightning speed but yet it still had such a slow lag in time.  I cannot believe I have been honored to live a life of 45 years. Wow! I am officially considered a middle aged woman.   I’m actually a full fledged adult--well you guys know what I mean.

It’s funny when we are younger we crave and are so eager to become adults and as we grow older we begin to see just how overrated ADULTING  truly is.   My younger self would not have seen the lessons that the University of Life would have taught me.

Life is about becoming.  It is about learning and growing. 

It's about understanding that we are all created to walk our own paths. 

As I think about this new chapter of my life, I am reflecting on what I have learned, experienced, and can now share. 

Acceptance of Beauty Was Always Within.

We are all created with purpose and with unique qualities.  I learned to accept that all my little quirks and flaws are just as beautiful as the parts of us that seem perfect and without blemishes.  As I look in the mirror I can embrace the many freckles and moles on my face.  The fact that my breasts are no longer perky and I do need to wear a bra.  The gray hair that seems to just want to showcase itself; damn they are some stubborn follicles.  These things will never change the beauty and essence of who I truly am.  In fact, I love the character it gives me.  My beauty exudes from the inside out.  It’s about my kindness, compassion and love that I have in my heart.  My soul is one that looks for the good in others and sees the beauty in everyday life.  Being the best you can be and allowing your light to show through will show your beauty for many years to come.

Letting Go Is Tough Because Perfectionism Does Not Exist

Holding on to things and people can seem practical and normal.  We tend to hold on to the familiar and what we are comfortable with.  Not all things should be held.  I have had to let go of unrealistic expectations of my life like being a perfect mother and wife. I had to stop with the BS of trying to be all things.  Who wants to be superwoman ALL the time anyway? 

Sometimes I feel if I let go, then I will lose control.  And guess what? That is ok.  Let your hair down sometimes and Just LET GO!

“No” Is A Complete Sentence.

It is ok to say no without any additional explanation.  For too long I was afraid to say no.  I thought it was selfish if I said no to being able to attend an event, or saying no to my husband, saying no to an additional responsibility at work; the list goes on and on.   Now, I find empowerment in being able to use my voice and saying no to things that do not fulfill me or I know will drain me.  Now, I can say NO without remorse.  It is important that boundaries are established and acted upon.  When I need to, I say, “NO.”  (If you need me to be more clear, that’s NO Period. No if, ands, or, but or suppose)

Be Courageous Enough To Be Afraid

It’s not about not being afraid.  Everyone is fearful of many things.  I know I have crossed paths with fear way too many times.  What I have learned is that if you allow it, fear will hold you back from many of life’s possibilities.  However, once you accept that you are afraid, you take a deep breath and find the courage to do it anyway.  Find a beautiful melody and dance with your fears.  It may be a two step or the Milly Rock, you be the lead. After a while you will realize that the very thing you were afraid of, you were brave enough to conquer.

Buy Yourself Fresh Flowers.

I used to look at flowers as a gift that I needed to receive on a special occasion.  Then one day I bought them for myself and it was such a nice gift.  It was a sense of gratitude and appreciation for me by me.  Do you have a favorite flower? Or thing to gift yourself?

Create A Life List NOT A Bucket List

I know most people create a list of things they would love to accomplish before they die.  I am not saying that is a bad thing.  I just look at it from a different lense.  I am creating the list of things I want to happen in the life I am living.  We all will leave this earth one day, so why not live your life on purpose.  Being the best version of yourself and doing some amazing things while we are alive.  Make the list and have fun!

Self Care Don’t Care

Be sure to take time to take care of yourself.  I used to put myself at the bottom of the list daily.  I had to learn the hard way that time for me is important.  Whether you create a morning routine with journaling, prayer, meditation or you decide to take time for a mani-pedi.  Whatever you choose, do it consistently.  Make sure you care for your body as well.  It is your temple.  That means exercise, eating healthy, and creating a spiritual practice to keep you grounded.

Cry When You Need It

Yes! Crying is so necessary for our emotional and spiritual health.  When you’re hurt or just need to release emotions, cry.  I must say the best ones are the ugly cries.  You know when your face is just not the most appealing and you may make that snorkeling sound.  Life is going to happen.  Sometimes we become overwhelmed with emotions and the best way to release is by running a shower and just crying.  It will cleanse the soul.

Believe In Miracles

I still believe in miracles.  Me waking up to see a new day is a beautiful miracle.  I have had three children.  Miracle.  I have received unexpected outcomes. Miracle.  Don’t lose the sense of wonder in life’s phenomenons.  All you need to do is look up in the sky after it rains and see the miracle of a rainbow. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog post.  Now I’d love to hear from you. Whatever age you are, what life lessons have you learned and what advice do you want to share?

Please let me know in the comments below.